Thursday, October 07, 2010

The Apprentice

It's back again.

Where on earth do they get these people from? Does anyone work with people who behave and talk like this?

Every year, I assume (always wrongly as it turns out) that this time they will weed out the tosser element.

Dan, the chap that got fired. Good grief. 'My motto is JFDI, just fucking do it'. Yep, you went on national television and actually said that. What the hell is wrong with you?

Stuart, the annual 'Little Britain' character, calls himself 'The Brand'. Really, he does, and in deadly seriousness. Don't these people have friends? If I had a chum who referred to himself as 'The Brand' (unlikely) I'd have to tell him, 'Look, mate, you know this 'Brand' thing, it makes you sound like a complete prick. Stop it. Now.

Melissa is a food distribution specialist. Last night's task was to make and sell sausages. When asked if she wanted to be team leader, she responded, 'Good God, no', and then proceeded to spend the rest of the task telling the team leader how she should be doing it. Not in a normal way, in a strange screeching way.

Raleigh is an unemployed undergraduate (PPE, my fave) who is so posh, he actually sounds inbred. I suppose that's what happens when generations of cousins keep marrying. His sole contribution was to go all red in the face and boggle eyed and bray 'Shameful!' at JFDI. I think he'd struggle to clean the khazi in a KFC, so quite why he thinks he qualifies for a position paying 100k p.a is beyond me.

Another of the ladies has a superb pornstar name, Paloma Vivanco. Made up surely?

A few weeks of hands covering eyes, did they really say that? moments to look forward to.

I'm glad Dara O'Briain got the gig for the follow up show. I suspect a few of the fired candidates will have some entertaining piss taking to look forward to.

I'm going sailing this weekend. The Solent. In October. Needless to say I was the worse for wear when I committed to it.


Brennig said...
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Brennig said...

There was much Pissing Ourselves Laughing during The Apprentice beano last night. That surgeon chap who says his first word was 'money'? Total prick. We're both already looking forward to next week's instalment. :)

Annie (Lady M) x said...

Eh up, surely it is the pricks who make it worth watching. There's nothing better than have something that you love to hate! I don't watch it that often, but I might tune in after reading your post.

How was sailing? You certainly picked the right weekend for it with the Indian Summer we just experienced!!

Gumpher said...

It is worth a watch Annie, just for the joy of yelling 'tosspot' at the telebox.

Sailing was ace, ta. lots of wind and sunny all weekend.