Tally ho !

Off to Koh Samui for two weeks.

Lick me.

We're all pissheads

A strange thing for a government to do, tackle middle class drinking. Can't stand class partitioning, but by earnings, house car, education etc, I suppose that I'm middle class, and I like a drink. In fact, everyone I know likes a drink. And the problem is ? All of my friends enjoy a few beers or a bottle of wine virtually every evening, which puts all of us over the government guidelines. And yet we have all helped the kids with homework, read them stories, put them to bed, got up when they're having nighmares, had the usual morning chaos and gone to work as normal. We have not smashed shop windows, got into a fight with a total stranger for no reason or whatever other vileness seems perpetrated in town centres up and down the country most days. There seems to me to be a slight problem with the area of focus. Booze and its effects seem to be increasingly problematical, but a bunch of thirty somethings having abottle of Merlot most nights of the week, do me a favour.

14 days and counting

Not that I'm excited or anything, but two weeks today, this will be home for a fortnight. The one major downside is twelve hours on a plane with boy number two. I'll have to top up on gin at Heathrow, pass out on the plane and leave A to deal with him. Or top him up on gin and strap him into a seat for the duration. The theory is that by taking a night flight they should spark out after the initial excitement, but theory and practice could be way apart.

On a different note, old cuntybollocks Blair is awfully quiet considering he leaves us shortly, last seen in Middle Burundi solving the African famine problem inside of a week to add to his already stunning legacy. And where on earth is the his able sidekick the portly drinks steward ? Probably lurking around the corridors of Westminster seeing if there are any desperate secretaries worth hanging out the back of. Big Brother seems to be getting more press attention than the labour party deputy leadership contest. They should wang them all in the house, that might rekindle the nations interest in politics. But then there's the awful thought that we might see Hazel blears in a bikini, and I reallly don't want to be barfing up a decent Chablis on a Friday night.