A harsh but true undeniable fact of life - if its got tits its a problem

When you've got small kids, mother's day is a double whammy. Not only do you have to make sure you get a card to your own mother, you also have to sort out the mother of your children. C & J had made cards at playgroup and school, but I thought it would be a bit tight to raid their savings for a present, so that fell to me. The smoked salmon and scrambled eggs, yep, me. I find it a bit like valentines day, contrived and a bit American.
C had a boiled goose egg and soldiers for his breakfast. The thing was fucking huge, it must hurt like hell to force one of those buggers out, no wonder geese are always stroppy, they must have permanent ring sting, whichever ring it passes out of. Boiled it for ten minutes and it still had a yummy runny yolk. He was hugely impressed.

Why is it, that when the uber chave reaches the age of, say seventeen, the thing it most covets is a shitty moped/bike that sounds like a shagged out turbo haidryer. A couple of retards in the village have taken delivery of a pair of clapped out piles of shite which must be vampires, because they only come out in the hours of darkness. Its not that they ride them quickly, because its not mechanically possible, but the noise irritates the crap out of me. Its like the crazy frog amplified, ring a ding ding ding ding. Could forensics trace it back to me if I rig up some kind of remote control clotheslining device ? Sorely tempted. I have no idea where these tools live, and I don't think they have any idea of how twattish they look. It's like a line up for the X chav factor, all crap shiny tracksuits, baseball caps and zits.

Good to see the dour Scotsman has sorted out global warming in the new budget. If I had a 50 grand motor doing 15 to the gallon I'd shit my pants with the new road fund licience. 210 quid, quick, flog it and get a prius or its the poor house for us. Tit

I ache, badly, still. Last Wednesday I decided it was time to start doing some exercise again after none (apart from a bit of golf which doesn't count) for ages.

So I turned up at the village badminton club. Two hours. I was shagged out, pulled a calf muscle and my groin. Feeble. It's wierd to see people you know on an aquaintance basis in a sporting concept, particularly when you wrongly guessed that they would have the sporting ability of an uncoordinated lemur as they spank your arse.Enyoyed it tho'

If you havent already, watch the David Gilmour concert on Radio 2's website, it's the ducks nuts.

The least said about rugby the better. Drawing with Italy at home, pile of wank. A small smirk watching Les Rosbifs get a caning down Paris way.

I do recall around this time last year a cry of 'I am Welsh and I am mighty'. Change to 'I am Welsh and I might have a nice new wooden spoon to stir my stew with'

Back to work. It's a bit bizzare after so much time at home, but it's time to start earning again. It's a good set up, a decent office in a converted farmhouse opposite a golf course. My largest client from the old company is still giving me regular business and prospects for more work look good.
The time spent at home was fantastic. C is at school,but to spend the amount of time I had with little J was a joy. He and A popped in to see me yesterday (home is only 10 minutes away, another bonus) and when they left he looked up and said 'Daddy, come home right now please'. I don't think he's got it yet.
Parents evening tonight. Should be interesting. C's teacher is a proper god botherer, and we've never really seen eye to eye. Should be the same old, agree that he's doing fine and then start arguing over the school's lack of competitive sport.